K2 Buys PMGear USA!!!!

**irul&ublo** · 06-01-2006, 02:25 PM

Vashon Island, WA (AP)...

Hot on the heels of its acquisition of Line and Kaharu, it was announced that K2 has also purchased start up merchandiser and ski manufacturer PMGear USA. Vice President Tim Petrick said: "We've been watching with interest the growth of PMGear, they have really stepped up with the "Bro" model and have a ski that is great for alpine, AT and telemark applications. Plus, the company has steeze, and when Tyrone [PMGear principal Tyrone Shoelaces]hucked Hospital, well, that sealed the deal."

Detailed terms of the acquisition were not announced, but the deal was said to be a combination of cash, K2 stock, hookers and blow. Petrick reported that production of the Bro model will be moved to a new factry being built near Phuket, Thailand and that present management would re-locate, splitting time between there and a new corporate office in La Grave, France, to oversee expansion in the European market. When contacted at The Moonlight Bunny Ranch, near Reno, NV, PMGear CEO Pat Keane commented, "FKNA!!!"

**Twoplanker** · 06-01-2006, 02:30 PM

Originally Posted by irul&ublo

Vashon Island, WA (AP)...

Hot on the heels of its acquisition of Line and Kaharu, it was announced that K2 has also purchased start up merchandiser and ski manufacturer PMGear USA. Vice President Tim Petrick said: "We've been watching with interest the growth of PMGear, they have really stepped up with the "Bro" model and have a ski that is great for alpine, AT and telemark applications. Plus, the company has steeze, and when Tyrone [PMGear principal Tyrone Shoelaces]hucked Hospital, well, that sealed the deal."

Detailed terms of the acquisition were not announced, but the deal was said to be a combination of cash, K2 stock, hookers and blow. Petrick reported that production of the Bro model will be moved to a new factry being built near Phuket, Thailand and that present management would re-locate, splitting time between there and a new corporate office in La Grave, France, to oversee expansion in the European market. When contacted at The Moonlight Bunny Ranch, near Reno, NV, PMGear CEO Pat Keane commented, "FKNA!!!"

Sweet, where's my check?

**Conundrum** · 06-01-2006, 02:33 PM

Originally Posted by Twoplanker

Sweet, where's my check?

Check? I thought the deal was hookers and blow (I hear the street rate is up).

**Twoplanker** · 06-01-2006, 02:38 PM

Originally Posted by Conundrum

Check? I thought the deal was hookers and blow (I hear the street rate is up).

Here at PMGEAR, we're already awash in hookers and blow, which has been nice. But I'm now looking for more of a structured cash/stock option compensation package.

**dfinn** · 06-01-2006, 02:41 PM

Originally Posted by Twoplanker

Here at PMGEAR, we're already awash in hookers and blow, which has been nice. But I'm now looking for more of a structured cash/stock option compensation package.

For a small startup you sure are pretty needy.

**Snow Dog** · 06-01-2006, 03:51 PM

Originally Posted by Twoplanker

Here at PMGEAR, we're already awash in hookers and blow, which has been nice. But I'm now looking for more of a structured cash/stock option compensation package.

They can't be very good hookers if you're still thinking about stock options.

**Rontele** · 06-01-2006, 03:54 PM

Dividends of hookers sound sweet.

**Pow4Brains** · 06-01-2006, 03:56 PM

Stay with the hookers and blow. You'll be better off in the long run.

**Rontele** · 06-01-2006, 04:01 PM

Merrill Lynch's chief analyst today came out and said that as a good hedge against economic uncertainty, every portfolio should have about 5% invested in hookers and blow.

**mntlion** · 06-01-2006, 04:06 PM

what is better, hookers and blow, or scotch and whores?

**Rontele** · 06-01-2006, 04:08 PM

Originally Posted by mntlion

what is better, hookers and blow, or scotch and whores?

In there lies the eternal mystery that has lingered with mankind since the earliest days of distillment. Shall one spend money on a fine scotch and women who walks the street. Or shall he up the anty and spend that extra coin on booger sugar and a escort that he got out of the yellow pages?

**pollard** · 06-01-2006, 04:31 PM

Originally Posted by Pow4Brains

Stay with the hookers and blow. You'll be better off in the long run.

I agree hookers and blow far stabler then the dollar

**splat** · 06-01-2006, 09:20 PM

Stock certificates are typed on small used squares of paper folded in triangles tucked neatly into used condoms. Feel free to take them into any bank for a cash exchange with a good looking teller.

**P_McPoser** · 06-01-2006, 09:27 PM

Originally Posted by splat

Stock certificates are typed on small used squares of paper folded in triangles tucked neatly into used condoms. Feel free to take them into any bank for a cash exchange with a good looking teller.

Quiet you fucking sellout.

**splat** · 06-01-2006, 09:36 PM

Originally Posted by P_McPoser

Quiet you fucking sellout.

Soory, McP. Them hookas was fiiiine.

**AudioSkier** · 06-01-2006, 09:45 PM

AAAH!
Hookers?
What have we come to in skiing?
PMgear is such a sellout. Jesus christ.

But on a more serious note, hospital was sick.

**P_McPoser** · 06-01-2006, 09:48 PM

Originally Posted by splat

Soory, McP. Them hookas was fiiiine.

Hookas are the shit. I like apple the best mmmmmmmmmmm.

**Vets** · 06-02-2006, 12:12 AM

Patches O'Houlihan: I've got some hookers in my room. What do you say we go celebrate? My treat.

**stuckathuntermtn** · 06-02-2006, 12:25 AM

this can't be real!? on the other hand, line karu and splat r rich fuckers right now. can i have some hookers and blow? geez i'm drunk

**Alkasquawlik** · 06-02-2006, 12:36 AM

Originally Posted by pollard

I agree hookers and blow far stabler then the dollar

mmm, disagree, nothing crashes harder than blow. When it's up, it's great, but the recession and subsequent depression can nearly kill a sane man. Scotch can be stable for 10, 12, maybe even 18 years. Pays off much better in the long term. The smart investment, imho, would be scotch and whores.

**Benny Profane** · 06-02-2006, 12:43 AM

Well, BP's advice is NOT to take any interests in residential real estate properties from those K2 snakes.

**addict** · 06-02-2006, 02:46 AM

Sweet, so Bros have rivets now?

**powstash** · 06-02-2006, 08:47 AM

did they need rivets? I think that would only weigh down the tips more than the tails (more surface area to put more rivets) causing many a maggot to spin off axis. Plus the light is right crew would be all up in arms. No, rivets would be bad.

Now a real airplane tip ornament on the origional bros would be stylie. I'll bet K2 could come up with something....actually I'd leave that up to Dynastar with thier old Course SL ski - remember that one with the red bubble tip ornament?

**Twoplanker** · 06-02-2006, 08:55 AM

Originally Posted by powstash

did they need rivets? I think that would only weigh down the tips more than the tails (more surface area to put more rivets) causing many a maggot to spin off axis. Plus the light is right crew would be all up in arms. No, rivets would be bad.

Now a real airplane tip ornament on the origional bros would be stylie. I'll bet K2 could come up with something....actually I'd leave that up to Dynastar with thier old Course SL ski - remember that one with the red bubble tip ornament?

**Tyrone Shoelaces** · 06-02-2006, 09:22 AM

Originally Posted by Alkasquawlik

mmm, disagree, nothing crashes harder than blow. When it's up, it's great, but the recession and subsequent depression can nearly kill a sane man. Scotch can be stable for 10, 12, maybe even 18 years. Pays off much better in the long term. The smart investment, imho, would be scotch and whores.

Can we get this guy a job? I there's a spot in the board room for fresh thinking like this.

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