I apologize; this is sure to be a super long TR - but will surely be worth the read. And there is no way in Hell that I will be able to type it all in one sitting; so check back throughout the day.
The TR actually starts the night before. After Alta received 12" of blower yesterday and it didn't start snowing until the cold front pushed through (i.e. read wet snowpack now solid as a Brick Chit House with 12" of love on top) my thoughts last night were conditions on Superior would prolly be peeeeeeeeeeerime tomorrow morning and we would only have to deal with some sluff and utilize our sluff management skills (more on that later). So, I fired up Powstash on the horn since I knew Superior from the top down the gut was on his "tick-list". Bummer; he couldn't go - had to be to work by 10 am. The more we talked about how good it prolly would be the more he changed his mind and it was on. I didn't even have to peer pressure him or twist his arm. Side note: I gave Harpo a quick call as well, but that friggin' gaper thought work was more important for some strange reason![]()
Edit to ad the [Paul Harvey Voice] "Rest of the Story" [/Paul Harvey Voice].
So I get gear laid out so all I have to do is just throw it on in the morning and hit the hay. It seems like either I sleep really good or like total crap the night before something that I am anxious about; happens alot in the summer to me also when rock climbing. Well last night was a total crap night for sleep. I think I maybe got like 2 hours. Nothin' a little Rockstar, creatine and ribose couldn't take care of though.
Wake up at 5, cook egg sammy and head to LCC park n ride to me Powstash. The lot is still closed to keep people from sleeping it over night and No Stash; WTF?? Then I see him come from the exit - seems he had to take a dook. We head up the canyon with the plan being to leave Stash's car right at the base of Superior; had to settle for Snowboard Entry 4 right by the race shack.
Park right next to Alta lodge and start gearing up. Man it is friggin' cold; my hands are frozen before I even get my boots on. Stash starts mumbling something about his alarm not going off and some weird dream about being in an avy waking him up [subtle foreshadow attempt]. We start skinnin' and about 15 minutes into it get passed by some dude haulin' ass; he disappears into the darkness and we both just comment to each other something about "he's from another planet". We get about 2/3 way up Cardiff (also known as Poleline) Pass - right by the first stand of trees - and Stash heads to the right to offer some fertilizer to those little pines. I get up to the flats and all of a sudden it's like God turned the lights on. It was so cool!!! Literally in the snap of a finger everything got 10x lighter and the sun hadn't even come over the peaks yet.
We get up to the pass and witness one of the most amazing sunrises I have ever seen. It was like a rainbow turned upside down over Cardiac Ridge. Purple and blue then red and orange; amazing!! I yelled at Stash to take a shot, but he said his digi wouldn't pick it up very well. The next 5 minutes were prolly the most beautiful 5 minutes I have seen for a long time. Super orange light hitting the peaks all around us from the Peiff to Baldy to Cardiac to finally Superior. SICK!!! Back to the East you could see PC covered in a thick layer of murky, fog.
It was about this time that my Camelback hose froze up and I was a little sketched on having enough fluid; more on that later. We get over the Weather Tower and I look ahead to see Steve Lloyd and two photo sluts shooting some pow shots with Hellgate in the background. Really good to see Steve gettin out early and working so hard this year to make the photo gig happen. I say heh and make some comment about Kendall being so far ahead and Steve replies that that's not Kendall but Rob Holmes.
It is also about this time that the 'trollers at Alta and Snowbird start chucking bombs on Baldy. I have stood within 50' of charges going off before but never heard anything as cool as I heard this morning. They literally sounded like thunder as their soundwaves traveled across the still sky. Unreal!!! This went on for a good half hour. A couple of times I stopped to look for lightning.
We get past the flat part of the ridge pretty quickly and get up to Little Superior (also known as the Black Knob). This is where things start to get pretty interesting and where I got turned around 2 years ago cause I was in alpine boots and didn't have my ice axe. We had also caught up to Rob by now and he commented that he thought we were haulin; Stash's reply: "just trying to make it to the top dude". The ridge from this point on is a series of "Hillary Steps" with each one having it's own kinda sketch factor and you can't see the next one until your done with the previous one which adds to gnarl factor cause you never really know when you may have gone too far to turn-around and go home. Somewhere on it, I said to Stash, "So, you glad you brought the whippet now?" We both just laughed really hard and that is when I decided what the title of this thread would be.
I can humbly say that the ridge had me puckered in two spots. I have not been in similiar situations since heli-ing in AK 3 years ago. There were mixed climbing moves throughout the whole damn thang, but the best move was a full body jug hug of a spire follewed by a dive to a tree back onto the ridge move. To bad Stash didn't get a shot of that onecause I was pretty proud of it.
After an hour of dealing with the ridge, we reached the summit. Stash had to be back at work so we didn't waste to much time up there. Had a candy bar, took a piss, drank some water from the now thawed camelback (thank God) and discussed how we would attack her.
She was warming up quickly so we needed to get on with it. Stash did a slope cut and dropped in first down to the side of the first choke. I followed. A little sluff, but nothing to write home about.
Stash then skis the first choke and around the corner to skier's right; I can't see him anymore. I wait a couple of minutes and yell his name cause I can't see him. No response. I yell again and again; no reply. I am thinking something's not right; he should be down to our decided upon stopping point by now. Finally he emerges and I head down the choke. The first half of it I remember thinking this thing is pretty firm; I wonder where all the snow went? Then just as it opens up a little (like 10 more feet) I cut just a little to the right for a soft pillow and crack, rip, OH CHIT, there it goes. I just jumped down on my edges super hard will all possible leg stength. I felt the slide move me a few feet at first, but once I jumped down on my edges was able to muscle it out. Whew; got lucky!! I looked up above me and like 20 feet above me was a rocky rollover. I thought to my self, ya friggin' dumbass you know better than that - pay attention!!
Anyway, I then get down to Stash and he said that happened to him twice and his trusty whippet saved him from sure injury twice. He was obviously spooked; like I've never seen him and I have climbed with him before and witnessed many an Elvis leg from him. This was different. He said the second one took him over the bars. Anyone with any mountaineering training at all knows that this is one of the hardest positions to get an ice axe/whippet set from. Glad ya made it Stash!!!
From there we ripped 1000' of some nice 35 deg creamy pow, pow down to the last choke. This choke is a runoff mini waterfall in the early summer and was a frozen waterfall today with no snow on it thanks to Steve Lloyd and his photoslut. It was fun none the less. You had to straightline it to get through it. I just kept going maching out turns on the bottom apron (20 - 25 degs) to the road. When I got to the road, about ten cars/trucks were driving real slow watching us yelling and screaming "sick" and giving the hang loose sign. I just chucked my poles into the air and turned around just in time to see Stash getting his monies worth by making some PC/DV turns.
Some high fives and pictures at the bottom and we were on our way back to Stash's Suby.
As I was driving down the Canyon, I had to stop and admire our turns for 5-10 minutes; made me so high on life. Ya know the kinda high where you can feel the perma grin on your face all the way down to your soul and you can't grab your favorite Cd fast enough.As people were driving up the Canyon headed for Alta or Snowboard, all I could think was - I don't care if I ever ski another lift served day in my life.
In summary, we skied one of the all-time classic Wasatch lines in pretty damn good conditions (hard to get since faces south) and we pretty much ripped the chit outta it and most importantly got to tell our kids about it tonight. I am sure we will both do it again, hopefully many times. It just sucks that to get it good, you almost always have to ski it the very next morning after a dump otherwise the snow on it will turn to chit. It is also one of those faces that you can get in over your head very quickly though if you don't know your line. And even when you do, you are exposed the top 1000' no matter which way ya go - you just can't see that you are sometimes. And definitely, definitely don't forget your whippet or ice axe (and know how to use them).
Total trip time: 6 to 9:15 summit; 9:35 to 10:25 ski down; 3k of vert.
My beer at lunch and filet mignon for dinner tonight never tasted so good.
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